New

So I decided to get a new blog. One that is just for business use really! I think it will be better that way! But I am keep this one too. I have not set it up yet so there is nothing there. When it is finished I will post again!!!

Am I Weak.... Or NOT?!

There have been many times in my life where I feel as though I am 'Weak' or 'Not worth it' even thinking things like 'Will I ever be proud of Myself?' I am so sick of the voices in my head trying to continually grill these negative thoughts into my head! I know that it is time to put a stop to it and just take a stand and be Proud of who I am! I guess a part of me wants to do the S.L.C Marathon to prove that 'I am worth it' and 'I can do what I set my mind to' and ' I am Beautiful' These phrases are easier to spell out then to say them out loud. I know that is something that must be changed! After all, I have so many things already...

I have a wonderful loving husband who loves me in spite of the things I feel. He is always there and says right thing at the right time and means it! I couldn't ask for anyone better. Then I have my faith. I know that if you put your whole heart and soul into doing whats right and following our father in heaven that everything will somehow turn out right. He is there to catch the tears that fall when something hurtful comes my way. He will always be there and I am so thankful for the gospel in my life!

I will keep going strong with my goal to do the S.L.C Marathon! This is an accomplishment that will not only prove "I CAN" but it will "Silence" the negative thoughts and phrases FOREVER!

But it's for Cancer..... we're still Crazy!!

Come April 16, 2011 Troy and I will be running a 1/2 Marathon! I know it sounds crazy but I believe that we can do it! It is a great goal to work towards and we want to prove to ourselves that we can accomplish something that is hard and takes so much work.... wait isn't that what people say about marriage?! ha ha Anyhow, we are really excited about this! The start time is 7am at the University of Utah and Finishes at the Gateway. Yeah it will be tough but we can do it! It's $45 a person and all the money goes to the Huntsman Cancer Foundation this year. Every year a new charity is picked as the cause of the marathon and this year its for cancer! So whomever would like to join this race for cancer, start training now to build up for this exciting event! Or check out the website www.saltlakecitymarathon.com! Or come cheer that is just as important!! You can also find the marathon checkpoints on the website as well! Let the real Training Begin!! EEK

Long Time NO Blog!

The season is changing and the sun isn't getting so hot and I am loving every minute. There has been so many things happening in life that it is time to start the fall season off right! The last entry that was blogged was the "peace of mind" of being ready to start a family when we were ready. That entry still holds true for us. I do feel like the time is approaching for us to start trying to have a family, but that approach is crawling toward us. Thinking about the responsibility of starting out our little family, I am okay with the crawling speed! Life changes on you fast and it is hard to catch up sometimes. No matter if it was jump started by one decision!

Today is going to be great day though. Despite the hard times that we thought would never end. (Hoping that the hard times have hit a road block of its own) Troy and I are going to get our car from the shop, which I am super excited about! It has been a long couple of weeks for us. First, the NICE car then the Second car. Yes, both times were caused by me.... Go figure! I think things are looking up for us though. Troy was offered to go back to full time and is doing well in school. I have a job that is fun and enjoyable. I just hope that everything keeps looking up for us.

I know so many more things have happened since the last entry. However, because it has been so long without saying much of anything, I come to find myself unable to recall a lot of what has happened! When I said I was going to start the fall season off right, I mean I am going to make a goal to keep blogging twice a week! If my goal was everyday I know I would never do it. So here starts day one of my long time without blogging! :)

Peace of Mind

Prayers are answered in very interesting, random and special ways!


It is hard to think of being selfish as a good thing. i always thought it was a bad thing? I believe that if i talk myself into thinking one thing, I should be hoping and praying for the right things. I find myself doing this on a hormonal basis instead of logic or in a spiritual sense or even per sanity. Never go off your hormones it will only bring you down. I say this in my own words which isn't really easy to understand when they are coming from me! I like to think of the future as it is already reality when in fact it is not reality until it becomes the present. I find myself always in the future of things and never taking the time to live and experience the present. I have wondered why i have been so down in the dumps with not just myself but life! I know that I am happily married and i wouldn't change that for the world! Troy is everything to me! My problem is that i long to be a mother! It is crazy for me to want something that is a HUGE, WONDERFUL, and LIFE CHANGING commitment when I have not been married for all that long. I always thought oh that doesn't matter its selfish to not start having kids when you are as young as Troy and I. We should start having kids now! ha ha who needs to be out of debt when it is so close to being achieved? who needs to have a savings of some kind? who needs to be READY??? Well everyone can answer those questions when they want and how they want because everyone views everything so differently. Well if i didn't have the privilege of having what i thought a pregnancy scare, then i would not be able to answer these burning questions for myself:)
The last three weeks I feel has turned things around for me. It could have been those that I love that I confided in that helped me realize that I was not living in the present time that I live now. They didn't not say the words " Heather stop living in the future and live where you are right now! " But the things that they said with care and love made me think that is what they really meant! ha ha For the past three days I have been living in the present! Now I know that living in the present is all about the future. We can plan for the future and make plans to make our future easier or in a sense better. The present can be just as exciting as the future! The great thing about the present is that later in life it becomes the memories of the past. Why not live it up?! Which leads me to the three burning questions that I have been able to answer for myself.

Debt! It plays such a role in the lives of so many people in the world today! There is maybe one thing that you should go into debt for and that might be a home or even education or I guess hospital bills!? But i don't know much about debt. All I know is that Troy and I have a plan to pay it off in a fast timely manner:) Savings.... really need i say more? A savings is something that we do not have. Why don't we have savings? Well that's easy because what could be a savings is going straight to debt! lol its a vicious cycle:) Being READY now that question is the burning question!

I always thought that being ready didn't matter cause nobody is ever ready! It was your responsibility as a member of the church or rather any women who doesn't have fertility problems should get on the wagon! ha so far from the truth it isn't even funny!! I am reading this book entitled " The Mother in Me " at first I thought that it would make me stay in the state of " I want a baby now and I don't care what has to happen to have one." Surprisingly it was also a key to the way that I feel now. There was a quote in there that said something like this... " Don't you think that our God is a merciful God that will allow you to be ready for motherhood? ( and parenthood) The way this phrase hit me was insane! I never really thought about that. I didn't think that could be possible. Why not be possible though? I'm just crazy I guess?! Now I understand what it might mean. We all come to this earth as not just helpless, fragile, cant fend for yourself beings. Rather, each child that is born is a child of a living Father in Heaven that wants nothing more then for each of his children to be raised to return back to him. In this purpose alone is the mercy of our Father in Heaven. He wants us married couples to grow together as one, to know each other, to be connected spiritually.... to be READY! I know that you can never be ready in the earthly sense for children but I want to believe that if you feel that you are ready in the spiritual sense of things, that if you can prepare yourself in this way that you will be inspired to do the things that will help you be "READY" in the earthly sense as well. The adventure is only going to get better:)

Troy and I will have children. As for when we will have children... we don't know that yet? We both want to go on adventures with each other. We want to " LIVE IT UP " we know now that we are not ready for children. Whats a shocker is, it gives me peace of mind! Everything happens in due time:)

Fun Sunday....

These are a few pictures of Troy and I with Adam and Lilli at Temple Square. It was way fun! We went over on saturday to have movie night, then we slept over. It was a nice weekend. I feel like we all know eachother better and better every time we are together. We really enjoy Adam and Lilli, they are great to be with!

Me and Troy!! We must love this pose ha ha
Troy, me, Lilli, and Adam

He was trying to get me in the water in this one lol

I love looking into his eyes! He is so good looking:)

Adam and Lilli. They are so cute!! Oh and they are expecting:)

The guys! ha ha they are to funny:)

Lost Holiday.....

So the year is coming to a close. Looking back on it all I wonder how I was able to get where am at this very moment?! I love the Holidays! I love most of the smells... as long as you don't have like more then one scent being lit or anything ha ha I love the trees, the food, the laughter, the tears of joy, and so much more!! I just have a hard time with the music ha ha that should be one of the most exciting things right? Well I love to listen to it when it is at least the day after Thanksgiving. I feel as if Thanksgiving is a forgotten holiday! Yes, we get together as family and friends, we talk, eat and laugh just the same. But, we go from having Halloween music to Christmas music. You don't hear in the Christmas music anything about Thanksgiving do you? I don't think so! So how come people say that they are intertwined? I don't think they are... but then again everyone is entitled to an opinion! So you can't get to mad I guess ha ha I just wish that Thanksgiving was a more acknowledged holiday. I can't wait to spend my First big holiday's with my sweet hubby!!!! The fun is just beginning:)

TAEBO BABY!!!!!

Alright, so I went out and bought me some Billy!!! I am hoping that this will help motivate me to get up in the morning and exercise! We shall see? I really think that it will. Just for the fact that I really like taebo! I think it is fun and easy to follow (most of the time, until he does double time ha ha) I have never done this DVD but it cant be to hard. Can it? I just really want to get in shape. Or rather in a healthier state! Mostly for ME, but also for my sweet hubby. I think that gaining more confidence will be better in all aspects of being married. Plus me wanting to become more healthy will also help me when it is time to start having babies! :) I want to stay healthy through the entire 9 months! I believe if I start now I will have more of a desire to continue. I know if I start, then my sweet Troy will help keep me motivated! Motivation is a big part of keeping up with your goals. ha ha "You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great" so Even though it has been like a week and a half since I said "change" ha ha I guess its better late then never right??! ha ha oh man so here we go!!! Maybe once I have the morning workout down then I can start doing the evening with Troy?! We shouldn't over due it though ha ha so.... starting over! A new Day One begins ha ha

Its still early...

OK so it is only the morning but I am already having a hard day so far! I have no idea what is going on with me right now nor will I find out until a few days more have come and gone! ha ha It is still early, so I am hoping for some comfort or peace of mind or some revelation telling me what is going on! Its still early so we shall see how the day plays out?!

These are my people.....

So I would like to tell you a lil bit about my brothers and sisters! So in this picture there is obviously Troy and me ha ha but starting after me we have...... In order of oldest to youngest. Phillip, Crystal, Levi, Rachel, and Garrett:) Now to say a lil something about my clan....

Phillip: He is my oldest brother. He has always been so great to me! He is married to Ashley, who is gorgeous! He has always been an example to me and he is the one who is always the voice of reason. Him and Ashley live here in Utah both working for the law enforcement. Phil is a UHP officer and Ashley goes to school and works as a dispatcher of some kind?! I love my brother so much and I am so grateful for his example! Thank you both for making our special day even more special:)

Crystal: She is my older sister. We share a connection that is valuable to me. She is hard working, honest and I believe she is very brave! Even though she lives far away in California with her man Cory. I still long for her to be here with us. She has always told me to believe in myself in all that I do and say! She has always been easy to talk to. She loves and cares for those who can't care for themselves. My big sister has taught that there is more to life then just sitting around thinking about yourself. She has taught me that when times get hard that there is someone who knows what you are going through and all you have to do is ask him for help. So get down on your knees and pray to the one who longs to listen! She is brave because she lives far away and is able to do it. If I was her I would be dying of home sickness. Her and Cory moved from Las Vegas to California and she didn't have job when she got there. She said " I know I will be OK because I am a hard worker " She has always been here to help me through my tough times! So I would like to say a big THANK YOU to my BIG sister Crystal!!! I love you

Levi: He has always been here for me. We get along so well because he is right before me. We used to do everything together. But then he married a wonderful, HOT Rachel!! Yes two Rachel's in one family does get really confusing lol He has always known how to get me out of sticky situations! He is my big brother who lives close and who I can tell everything of everything to! I love them both! Oh, and they have a super cute baby boy named Ethan. He is not so babyish now but he is super super cute!!! He turns one year old in November! I would also like to say thank you for making our day special:)

Rachel: My sweet, strong, bright lil sister! Rachel is one of a kind! She is photogenic and wonderful to be around. When you are with her you can't help but laugh when she is laughing! She brings a light into a room that makes you feel something that you cant explain. She has to be the strongest of all us! She will graduate this coming year and we are all super proud of her! I just want her to know that me and Troy are always here for you! We love you and care for you more then we are able to express. Rachel, I know that you are strong and brave and that you will make it through every trail, struggle, heartache and sorrow of your life! You have always been a bright young women who knows what is up! I love you so very much! Just continue being as strong as you are! You have family and friends who are always here for you. I love you and I am here for you when you need me! Thank you for being one to make the process of the wedding bright and enjoyable:) Stay strong!

Last but not least... Garrett: This lil brother of ours has to be the Smartest of us all. He has never once sluffed or anything! How does he do it ha ha He is bound and determined to get a 4.0 in school so that he can have my dad help him buy a truck. Very smart move dad!! ha ha Garrett is a wonderful lil brother. Even though he can totally take me now, which is completely unfair on so many levels lol jk he is the best lil brother anyone could ask for. He has always been willing to share what he knows and help you understand Gods plan! He will be a GREAT missionary when the time comes!! He turns sixteen in February! Blah he is getting so big ha ha I love you lil brother:) Thank you for also helping us make our big day so great!

Ladies and Gentlemen... those are my Brothers and Sisters!!! They are the greatest people you could ever come in contact with:)

Day 4.....

OK.... my change process is not going very good right now! ha ha I believe I am doing better at Thinking better of myself. But, the physical change has not even started to take place:( I think I need some kind of motivation? I know I can do it but I have a hard time doing it by myself. So if you have any suggestions please let me know!! ü

Over due Wedding Pics 08/26/2008

All the pictures are out of order! So lets just make the best of it! Here we go....

Dont you just LOVE my shoes? They killed my feet for sure! But, it was still a fun filled day at Memorial Park in Salt Lake City. If you haven't guessed it.... this is a bridal pic and there are some more where this one came from! ha ha

This pic is one of the BEST! This was all Troy's idea. Isn't it so great?! I love the Temple in the back ground!!! Yes we were married in the Salt Lake Temple:) Oh what a Wonderful day! He is all mine and I his for all ETERNITY! That is so great to say ha ha

Look at the emotion in this one!? oh man I ABSOLUTLY LOVE IT! Troy is so Handsome!!!!

This pic was taken when we were sharing our "vows" but more like a claim on each other or something! Sharing our words of love and such! Yes he did make me cry:) but this pic doesn't show that ha ha

This pic was also at the Temple. Oh I just love the feeling you have when you look into your hubby's eyes for the..... well like my hundredth time for the day ha ha but it still feels like the first time. Even now I feel the exact same way!! I love being Married to Troy:)

This pic is funny to me. The lil man is Troys nephew Kayden. We were doing the dollar dance and he came up, handed me the money then ran away ha ha it was so funny! but he came back and we danced!!

This pic cracks me up ha ha obviously Troy is on left and on the right is his brother Corey. He was one of the Best Men. Don't they just make you want to laugh ha ha oh man! :)

This is my all time FAVORITE bridal pic. I just love it. I love the color, texture, look, and ME ha ha I just love the way everything was captured. Its one of Troys favs too!

This is the all the Best Men and Us. Starting from the Left. Me, Troy, Corey, Trevor and Shaun

Don't they just look so handsome!!! The great thing is they can totally wear those shirts again!! :)

This pic is just amazing! I believe it self explanatory!? Hope so cause it rocks lol

Awwww smell the pretty flowers!!! My sister Ashley did all the flowers for the wedding! With the help of my moms good friend Elizabeth!!

Oh man WE are so GOOD LOOKING!!!!

Our future kids are going to be HOT lol oh man

That is my dad and me. He is the most amazing man you will ever meet. Our song was " I loved her first" by Heartland. I just remember being held in his arms and I just started crying! ha ha One because, well its a daddy daughter dance! Two because he just kept saying " Me and your mom are so proud of the choices that you and Troy have made! I love you Heather" See isn't he the Greatest!! He said he loved me:)

This one was the start of the daddy daughter dance! This was when he said " Don't cry, its too late to turn back time" ha ha dad! but it still made me cry:)

This is the BESTEST pic EVER of my Troy!!!! Doesn't he look so HAPPY!! ha ha He is dancing with his... I'm mean our sister in law Hilary. It was the money dance

Let me just say that the water was FREEZING ha ha oh man but we just wanted to do one where I was holding my dress up! I look like a marshmallow lol ha ha

Alrighty, so that was some of the great days before the wedding. (which would be the bridials) and then the day it self! I will have to continue tomorrow!! Yippee let the fun continue:)

Image....

I have never been one to think very highly of myself. I am sad to say that my self esteem or image of myself has always been one of so much negativity that it has started to depict every action, emotion, speech, dress, thought, health, friends, and activities of my life. Why, and how does something come to consume everything about you without you really realizing it? I honestly feel that for me, it is because I let it consume ME. I read this quote today off a website " You are what you think you are, no more, no less."
It has been so long of feeling like I am worth nothing, good for nothing, ugly, obese girl who tries to hide the true feelings of what is deep within my soul. This is hard to write for me... but if I can't write it out, how will I ever over come the negative me that I feel inside within me? For years I blamed the way I felt on other people for different reasons. Not once did I ever think that problem was truly all ME. I have let it consume who I want to be. Letting this hate overcome me will and has only made the inner me start to fade. I can not bring children into this world that is already hard enough and only getting worse; if I cant even cover come how I look and feel about myself. That would be an extremely bad role model for my future children. I want my inner Heather back! Reading this quote has opened my eyes in only one sentence! I have thought all these negative things about myself for so long that I have become what I thought I was. Nothing more, nothing less. I have looked at so many models, friends, family members, celebrities and class mates. Each of whom I have always compared myself to. I have always thought that the reason I never dated in high school or after high school was because of the fact that I was not thin or good looking enough for the men I came in contact with. When really if I had been able to see past of the worldly things, I could have happier and more confident years ago. Guys are attracted to confidence! The problem... which it is a problem that is within me. It is my choice and my choice alone to change how I see and feel about MYSELF.
Fortunately I have a loving husband who accepted me and my negative inner self. He seemed to just see past all the things that I saw. He would tell me time and time again that he doesn't see what I see. He see's someone who is beautiful, smart and out going. Someone who can be their own person, but seems to be holding back. He even told me that if I wanted to change I am the only one to change things. In order to be truly Happy you need to be happy with yourself and everything else will fall into place around you. To an extent mind you! ha ha
So I am going to take the first step and admit that my unhappiness of my image is a problem. That does more then just hurt me. Second: I will strive harder to say positive things about myself more often, and Third: Doing things that make me happy with ME. Mind you I don't really know how to go about this plan but I know that Today is the first day of change for ME! If I can do it, and mind I am one of the stubbornest people you will meet! ha ha then anyone can do it:) The change of Me is about to begin!

Piano Lady...

So last night Troy and I went on a double date with Alex and Rachel. We went down to the University of Utah to see a performance by one of Alex's music teachers. So we get to the campus, parked and walked to the building. Now when I say that we walked to the building, I mean we walked and walked and walked! ha ha ha jk It really wasn't that bad:) Well we were passing building after building and we couldn't seem to find the right building that the performance was in. Well while we were searching we came across one building that had a performance called Thriller. Oh man, we all wanted to go to it so bad! But when you have the choice between FREE and almost $30 a person. And when you are both poor newlyweds, you choose the free stuff ha ha so that is what we did. Which was good for Alex:)



The music was relaxing and enjoyable. We were introduced to something new. I didn't recognize the first piece that was played, but I did recognize part of the second piece. It was by Mozart! The piece was also one of the theme songs from the new Pride and Prejudice. Which is a movie I love! The other selections I was not familiar with either. So it was harder to pay attention sadly enough. The final piece was one of the longest pieces preformed. When she announced that the final piece was 30 minutes long... all four of us looked at each other and just laughed ha ha so we stuck it out and finished with the Piano Ladies Performance! It was great fun till the end. I am happy that we went and would totally go again:)

Should one Vote?

So I am not Politically smart in any way shape or form. But I must say that I honestly feel like I NEED to VOTE!! I don't know why?! All I honestly know is that I definitely do NOT want Obama:( I do not agree with some of the things that he says. He has made "mistakes" constantly! I received an email that really got me thinking. Has he really said what changes he is going to make? What they are? I am not in the least bit racist. It is just a matter what to agree upon. For everyone to get an education... for FREE, I do not think is fair for those that took time, money, and hard work to get where they are in their lives. I am no graduate student myself. But what happened to hard work? Also, taking GOD out of everything that AMERICA was built upon is being taken away just to satisfy 3% of our population. Where is the logic in that? Our ancestors came to America for Religious freedom right? Well then why cant we just deal with the fact that not everyone believes what someones else believes. That is totally fine. We are a free country. The declaration was perfect the way it was. There were less and problems I think. Mind you I know nothing when it comes to Politics but we really need to think about who we are voting for? What they will bring to the table that will make it better for the better? and why we are voting? I have never voted before but I feel like my opinion isn't worth much if I didn't take the time to vote for myself either. Every vote counts!!!!

Immature...

So today.... I will admit that I was in the wrong to act like I was acting! In so many words I was... A five year old lil girl again. I was snappy and grumpy for reasons that are so silly. All because I felt like I was being treated like I was stupid. But what was EVEN more stupid was how I reacted to my treatment:( I must say two wrongs don't make a right. Lame I know, but I was very upset ha ha although that does not excuse MY behavior! Right?!

Canadian Thanksgiving

So Monday was Canadian Thanksgiving. But we celebrated it on Sunday so more of us could come. We celebrate this day, because my mom is from Canada and it means a lot to her to celebrate her Holidays too! Make sense? So we got together and ate yummy food. Same as here really. Homemade stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, chicken instead of turkey, clam dip, ( not my specialty) jello, cherry pie and pumpkin pie, and other stuff that I just cant remember. I love the food!!!! It's so good every time you eat it. But I love having family together! We did miss my Brother Levi and my Sister Crystal and her man Cory, but when work and miles come up, sometimes you just cant do something ya know?! Although it was still so fun. My nephew Ethan is killer funny! ha ha even though he like almost one he is a hoot to play with! He mimics everyone all the time ha ha it kills you because your laughing so hard your insides hurt. Then there is the games and Teasing! This was the first get together with my family since Troy and I have been married. Well like a holiday gathering that we have been to. So it was funny to see how everyone connected. The boys played Mario cart and whatever other games you play with N64. There was razzing going on like crazy ha ha then there is the Dice game! Our Grandpa Cook taught us. We consider the game Canadian just because of who we learned it from. Its like a math game but more WAY more fun! ha ha So we played it. Amazing fun it is lol Being together with family is so great:) I'm happy that I have them!!!

Little things...

So things have been going so great with me and my hubby Troy! We have had our lil rough spots now and then but who doesn't?! I love everything about being married. There was this one time I was driving home, and dreading the fact that there were dishes in the sink, dinner needed to be made, the bed needed to be made, washing piling up and all the other things that go along with keeping a clean home. The entire drive home was awful:( To my surprise, my sweet, hard working Troy, had already done everything! I walked through the door and the smell of candles filled my lungs along with dinner! I was in heaven! (He even greeted me at the door with a kiss! it was great!!) I was so surprised that these little things were done. I know how hard he works day in and day out. I didn't expect him to do the little things. But in all reality, it's the little things that make the harder things in life endurable! Having Troy as my eternal companion is a blessing, gift and honor. He makes my life complete. He is hard working, non judgemental, loving, caring, and will be a great role model for our future children. I know that he will teach them things that make life simple but not easy. Like not judging. That is something that is so incredibly hard for me. But he seems to do it just fine! How does he do it?! ha ha I am grateful for the Husband that I have! I could and would never ask for more then for me to be loved, cared for, and honored! Which I have the privilege of already having those things. I can not wait to share a life of love, laughter, sorrow, birth, and so much more. All because I have a companion to stand by my side:) I am Happy to say that.... I am proud to to Mrs. Troy Georgell!

My Future Husband..... Troy

Troy is the most amazing man I have ever met in my life. He is so wonderful in the way he handles things. He always tells me: " Heather you cant judge other people even when they judge you. You can choose how to react, but it is not your place to judge them." I am one to judge and he is always reminding me that it is not important for me to judge people. Just to try and love them. How would it be if I was in there shoes? He is intelligent in the gospel. He served his mission in Boston Massachusetts and he wants to go back one day to see all those who he was able to teach the gospel too. I want to go back to meet them have some of the same experience of what he sahred. I recently had the chance to meet a lady who had nothing but love for Troy because he came to knock on her door. I also was able to meet one of his companions who also had so many wonderful things to say about "Georgell" they shared so much together and I cant wait till I can do the same. He is also amazing at art! Oh his art, lol he is a great artist. He is extremely talented. I wish that I could be more like him, but I'm not. I think that is why we belong?! He completes me. I complete him. He helps me to be a bigger and better person in everything I do. He always is so caring and understanding and willing to listen before he makes his assessment of things. He loves to play ball and mess around. He is so easy going and I love it. I love him. He treats me like I am equal to him. He doesn't degrade me in anyway, shape or form. He is the one who holds me when I cry, who kisses my tears away, who sings my favorite songs to me. He holds my hand and is not afraid to kiss me in front of his friends. He cherishes me in ways I could have only Dreamed about, but now I don't have too. I am so proud of the man that he is and the man he is still becoming. I'm so happy with him. I am so very excited to be in his life and him in mine. I WONT live without him. He is my shelter, my sanctuary, the one gives me so much in life its self and the life after this. I try to say I love you as much as I can through out the day because you never know what life will throw your way. I don't want to regret a moment that I could have said " I LOVE YOU TROY" when I know I should have said it. With Troy life is better. He is my rock that I hold onto when I just cant take it anymore. Troy is my life, my future husband, the father of my future children, and my best friend. So for all the world to hear TROY I LOVE WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING AND SO MUCH MORE THEN I CAN POSSIBLY EXPRESS! Thank you for choosing me:) " when your holding hands your never far apart"

Rough.... and worth it:)

So I am getting married in 7 days from today. It has been a hard road for me and my future hubby. There have been many tears from us both. But even though we have struggled these last few months I know more then ever that we are meant to be together for all of eternity. I know that Troy is the man of dreams and reality. I am so excited for us to share our lives together and get to know each other on levels I didn't know could be possible. I also know that we are going to grow together and become better people in life because we have each other to lean on when times get rough. I was told that in married life " if you always put his needs before your own he will see that you do and do the same for you" I honestly believe that when you both have a goal to always respect and cherish one another then your marriage will be full of love. Although, LOVE is not the only thing marriage needs to help keep it strong and worth while. You also need trust, honesty, integrity, communication, understanding, and a willingness to let the other person grow to the best of thier potential. With Troy I believe that all of this is possible. No matter how much you love someone you will fight and bicker and blame the other when things go wrong. I don't think it is OK to be petty towards one another; you don't always have to be right. Enjoy the time you have together, having hard times makes the good times that much sweeter:) "Don't forget to create YOUR memories!"